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SEXUALITY: YOUR SEXUAL IDENTITY
Author: admin
Sexual identity is determined by a complex interaction of genetic, physiological, environmental, and social factors. The beginning of sexual identity occurs at conception with the combining of chromosomes that determine sex. Actually, it is the biological father who determines whether a baby will be a boy or a girl. Here’s how it works. All eggs (ova) carry an X sex chromosome; sperm may carry either an X or a Y chromosome. If a sperm carrying an X chromosome fertilizes an egg, the resulting combination of sex chromosomes (XX) provides the blueprint to produce a female. If a sperm carrying a Y chromosome fertilizes an egg, the XY combination produces a male.
The genetic instructions included in the sex chromosomes lead to the differential development of male and female gonads at about the eighth week of fetal life. Once the male gonads (testes) and the female gonads (ovaries) are developed, they play a key role in all future sexual development because the gonads are responsible for the production of sex hormones. The primary sex hormones produced by females are estrogen and progesterone. In males, the hormone of primary importance is testosterone. The release of testosterone in a maturing fetus signals the development of a penis and other male genitals. If no testosterone is produced, female genitals form.
At the time of puberty, sex hormones again play major roles in development. Hormones released by the pituitary gland, called gonadotropins, stimulate the gonads (testes and ovaries) to make appropriate sex hormones. The increase of estrogen production in females and testosterone production in males leads to the development of secondary sex characteristics. Male secondary sex characteristics include deepening of the voice, development of facial and body hair, and growth of the skeleton and musculature. Female secondary sex characteristics include growth of the breasts, widening of the hips, and the development of pubic and underarm hair.
Thus far, we have described sexual identity only in terms of a person’s sex. Sex simply refers to the biological condition of being male or female based on physiological and hormonal differences. Gender, on the other hand, refers to the psychosocial condition of being masculine or feminine as defined by the society in which one lives. Each of us expresses our maleness or femaleness to others on a daily basis by the gender roles we play. Gender identity refers to the personal sense or awareness of being masculine or feminine, a male or a female. It may sometimes be difficult to express one’s true sexual identity because of the bounds established by gender-role stereotypes. Gender-role stereotypes are generalizations about how males and females should express themselves and the characteristics each possesses. Our traditional sex roles are an example of gender-role stereotyping. Men are thought to be independent, aggressive, better in math and science, logical, and always in control of their emotions. Women, on the other hand, are traditionally expected to be passive, nurturing, intuitive, sensitive, and emotional. Androgyny is the combination of traditional masculine and feminine traits in a single person. Androgynous people do not always follow traditional sex roles but rather try to act appropriately based on the given situation. The process by which a society transmits behavioral expectations to its individual members is called socialization. Gender roles are shaped, or socialized, by parents, peers, schools, textbooks, advertisements, and many forms of media including television, music, and movies. Think about the current television shows you watch. Do the characters play out traditional gender roles?
By now you can see that defining sexual identity is not a simple matter. It is a lifelong process of growing and learning. Your sexual identity is made up of the unique combination of your sex, gender identity, chosen gender roles, sexual orientation, and personal experiences. No other person on this earth is exactly like you, and it is up to you to take every opportunity to get to know and like yourself so that you may enjoy your life to the fullest. As the saying goes, sex is what you are born with, but sexuality is who you are.
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read comments (0)CONTRACEPTION AFTER CHILDBIRTH
Author: admin
Childbirth is a dramatic event, an intensely emotional occasion. It is a time of great physical and hormonal change, and of psychological readjustment. Psychoanalysts have called it a ‘maturational crisis’ – a woman’s abrupt transition from girlhood to motherhood, often bringing to mind previously unconscious recollection of the mothering she herself received. For the couple, it is a time of domestic and social upheaval and reassessment of roles. Such factors may have a profound effect on sexual feelings, which providers of contraception need to understand if they are to meet fully their patients’ individual needs.
As with any major event, the immediate effect of childbirth is one of shock; in this case usually succeeded by a need to care for and bond with a new baby. The woman’s ability to cope with the experience will depend on several important factors, namely the physical and psychological severity of the event itself, her personality and past experience, the fulfilment or otherwise of her expectations, and on the relationship she has with her partner.
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THE COUPLE – CONCLUSION
Author: admin
The decisions of this couple regarding a pregnancy and the chosen method towards success had been made outside the medical setting. They made their own choices, showing that doctors can provide every type of counselling for couples, but they will only be able to use what is comfortable for them. Counselling is a two-way process and no-one can be forced into sharing their anxieties.
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There are certain basic differences in counselling a woman with an unplanned pregnancy compared to other counselling situations (Coles, 1983). First, there is a definite time limit. If the woman is contemplating abortion, this is safer and easier if performed before about 12 weeks’ gestation. As it can take some time to organize a hospital appointment and a bed, this may result in little time for discussion between diagnosis of the pregnancy and arranging a possible abortion. Sometimes it is better to make the arrangements first and then allow time for counselling, cancelling the appointment later if necessary.
Second, a decision has to be made. One would normally not advise anyone to make an irreversible decision at a time of great stress, yet if the pregnant woman avoids making a decision, a baby will arrive. A further problem is that the doctor has the legal power to agree or disagree to an abortion. Some women may resent this power, or feel they have to give a good enough story to convince the doctor, thereby making it difficult for the doctor to know what they really feel. For this reason, many clinics have nonmedical counsellors. The doctor can diffuse this situation, however, by making it plain at the beginning that he or she is willing to arrange an abortion and then allowing the woman time to discuss her feelings.
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A man might agree to a vasectomy under pressure from his wife because she is angry at her years of contraception, and feels it is his turn now. He may even feel he is being sacrificed, but cannot resist without being thought selfish, or because of a strong need to please her. Either might see the sacrifice as a solution to, or a punishment for, a problem which is not directly one of contraception – sexual, marital, financial and so on. In this case, sterilization can be seen as part of a marital battle, and not purely a contraceptive choice.
However, where this method is chosen for good reasons, the balance for the couple is clear. They exchange total medical control of the operation, plus some discomfort, for a future sexual life completely free of any interference from doctors, no matter how well meant or caring.
For both patient and doctor, the choice of contraceptive method is a question of balancing the wanted effects against unwanted ones. For the doctor this may seem a medical decision, but it is far more complex to the user. A desire for privacy, a conscious or unconscious fear of artificial interference and an added zest to sex if a pregnancy is possible, even if not wanted, are rarely discussed in the family planning clinic. For the patient, the need to be in control of one’s sexual life is weighed against the undoubted benefits of modern contraception with the consequent medical intrusion. The health professional who understands this hidden agenda can offer care in its true meaning.
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A common human tendency is to project negative feelings outwards, often onto those who are seen to be in authority. The contraceptive doctor may be the recipient of negative projections when he is seen as the agent of social control, preventing what comes naturally and making value judgements about the reproductive behaviour of others, ‘stopping all the lovely babies’ as one woman put it. Alternatively, the doctor can be blamed when medical methods fail, especially when the patient has wanted the doctor to take control, and to somehow save her from her own muddle and failure.
The conflict within the individual, presenting as a contraceptive difficulty, may turn into a kind of fight between the patient and the doctor. The patient takes up an extreme position and somehow forces the doctor to take an opposing one. If the doctor can recognize that such a fight is taking place and remember that it is a product of the internal problem (no easy task in the middle of a fight!) some understanding and resolution may be possible. Thus the doctor might say, ‘You know, I’ve been wondering whether this argument we seem to have got into is something to do with different parts of you disagreeing. There seems to be that part of you saying you don’t want to get pregnant struggling with the part of you that does, so that on the one hand you do want a reliable method of contraception while at the same time anything I offer is rejected.’ This may free the woman to explore her dilemma more openly with herself.
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KEEPING POTENCY: AVOID STIFF DRINKS
Author: admin
Long-term drinking can also sap your potency. Many me know firsthand that drinking too much makes them unable t get an erection, at least temporarily. What isn’t as well Know is that long-term heavy drinking can sabotage potency. While no one fully understands just how this works, we do know the excessive alcohol can severely reduce the production of testosterone in the testicles. Whatever small amounts of the hormone a chronically heavy drinker does manage to produce may be rendered ineffective by his damaged liver, which hi to metabolize the hormone. Large amounts of alcohol can also hurt the nervous system, which plays an important role in erection.
The effects of this type of self-sabotage can remain undetected for years, finally recognized only after serious damage to potency has occurred. Limit your use of alcohol now so you’ll enjoy sex in the future.
You don’t need to give up liquor altogether; you just need to be moderate. In small amounts—such as one beer or one 4-ounce glass of wine or one shot of hard liquor per day-alcohol may actually increase the cholesterol-removing HDLs in your body, and thus help prevent clogs in your arteries, There’s no question, however, that large amounts of alcohol will do you and your erections much more harm than good.
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In general, a good candidate for implant surgery is emotionally stable.He is not severely depressed, though of course, some depression is common. Some doctors perform implant surgery only on men with physically caused potency problems, but other physicians find that men whose erection problems are attributed to psychological factors, if properly screened, can be quite satisfied and happy with the results of surgery. (These men may not have found that sex therapy improved their erections.) Whether physical factors are present or not, if s generally agreed that implant surgery should be considered only after any simpler treatments have been tried.
If a man has a regular partner, it’s enormously helpful, both lovers are motivated to solve the problem. And it’s important that the couple continue to be warm toward each other and try to maintain good sexual communication.
One study shows that men interested in increasing their sexual enjoyment and that of their partners, as well as in regaining a feeling of being a “whole man,” are much more satisfied with the results of surgery than those who are trying to improve relationships, change their marital status or the number of their sexual partners, or have children. And, not surprisingly, men in better health and with fewer complications after surgery are more likely to be pleased with their results.
A good candidate for implant surgery is not overly concerned with the size of his penis, because a penis erect from an implant usually will be slightly smaller in circumference and slightly shorter in length; he is healthy enough to withstand the operation, which sometimes requires a general anesthetic; he recognizes that he will experience pain following the operation, and that it will be weeks (and occasionally, months) before he is fully recovered and able to enjoy his newfound potency. Most important of all, perhaps, he is motivated by a strong desire to have intercourse and to get his problem fixed. He does not look upon the surgery as something to change his personality or make him more popular.
Of course, not all good candidates for surgery need to fit each of these criteria perfectly. Perhaps the most important factors are that a man who is considering such surgery be honest with himself, his partner and his doctor about his needs, wants, hopes and fears regarding the implant and the changes it will bring; that he gets answers to his questions (and a second opinion if he likes); and that his expectations are based on facts and information, not on myths and wishes.
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As I mentioned in Chapter 2, ginseng has already been shown to have an amazing ability to enhance erections. This herb contains many gensenosides, also called panaxosides, which are biologically active compounds thought to be responsible for its physiologic activity. If you have access to an Asian market, buy whole ginseng roots or “tails,” which are pieces trimmed off from the main root. The natural product is expensive, selling for as much as $20 to $30 an ounce, depending on availability. The roots and tails can be chopped, and the pieces steeped in hot water, to make a herbal tea.
How much or how often ginseng should be taken depends on personal need. For men who are thirty-five to fifty-five years old and in good health, small quantities—about one eighth of an ounce of prepared or whole root—may be taken regularly as a tonic. For older men, this dosage can be doubled to one fourth of an ounce taken daily.
A much easier solution is to buy commercially prepared ginseng tonics, powders, and capsules; health food stores and pharmacies stock them. Be sure to check labels for gensenoside or panaxoside content. Price is another indicator of quality; look for higher-priced products manufactured by a reputable company. To get maximum results, follow the label directions.
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If couples cannot talk to each other about the effects that ED is having on their relationships and their lives, they should seek psychological help. At the other end of the relationship spectrum are the majority of people I see. For them, the availability of the pill has prompted the most heartfelt and honest self-evaluations I have ever heard.
One of the most memorable examples of this was articulated by Janice, a forty-five-year-old woman who was about to be married for the first time when her fiance, Vincent, began to experience ED. They came to my office and Janice offered a keen insight into what kind of person she was and the bond she and Vincent shared.
“Vincent says that we should delay our marriage, that he’s having second thoughts and doesn’t want me to be saddled with a man who is ‘defective,’ “she said. “I’m trying to make him understand that, to me, he’s a hell of a lot more than just stud service. We’ve been together for two years. During that time we’ve traveled, met each other’s friends and family, and discovered what we like—and dislike—about each other. Then, last year, my mother became very ill. It was a very rough time for me and my family, and Vincent was there, every step of the way. And when she died, he gave me the kind of support I hope everybody gets at a time like that. I’ll never forget it, and I’ll never leave him when he needs my help.”
For Janice and Vincent, whose bond is based on growing together, the pill offers another opportunity to build on an already solid foundation. Because their self-esteem is not moderated by selfish motives, they can share the problem and revel in its solution. They are now happily married. The pills prescribed for Vincent have made a satisfying relationship that much better.
But what do you do if your partner won’t see a doctor?
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